With the darkness creeping up on us, now less than 2 weeks away. I have began to notice a change in myself as well as others. The sun is virtually gone now, we get a twilight glow for a few hours a day, but right now at 11:00am the moon is still out and a shadow hangs over the station. It is definitely an ere feel. Our winter crew has not jelled together yet like everyone said we would. Before winter started the main reason I was excited to winter was because of all the great people that were staying, the people I had a lot of fun with during the summer months. Well once that last plane left and winter was upon us, all those great people that I was excited to be wintering with locked themselves away from the community. Everyone seems to go to work, get there food to go and eat, drink and hang out in there rooms by themselves or with a select small group. I am disappointed once again. I asked winter-overs from past years if this was normal and at the beginning of the season they said "yes, people hang out alone for awhile but then once the crew jells they will come out and it will be great". Well it has now been almost 2 months since the last plane left and people are the same, so I ask the question again. Is this behavior typical for winter here? Now my answers I receive are "no, this is a really strange winter and the crew just wont jell".
You know last winter at Palmer I had a similar problem. The majority of our winter crew went to Fire School and OSAR Training back in the states before we went to the Ice. During those two weeks we had a lot of fun, getting to know each other and hanging out. So I was excited to get to Palmer and spend the winter with these great people. Once we arrived on station and relationships were formed. We never saw each other outside of work and meals. I asked the same question last year to my buddy Craig who had seen different summer and winter crews at Palmer. Craig, is this season normal or what? His answer was the same as what I am getting this year at McMurdo, at first its normal but the crew should come together and it never did. So now I start to think, what is so different about these two seasons compared to past ones.
The obvious one is I am here. Hmmmmm, could I be causing the destructive vibe of the crews??? Although that could be, I think it goes back to a hiring issue. Both seasons the exact populations and the crews were not finalized until very late in the summer season. So what does that get you? That gets people who are new to the program or new to winters, this year roughly 60% and last year every single person except the station manager had never been to Palmer, let alone wintered there. This poor planning on hiring also gets people to winter that were here for summer and did not intend on wintering. I think this is a big issue, because you get your self mentally prepared to spend 4 or 5 months here and then go travel the South Pacific and go home. When all of a sudden without a break you are now spending 12-14 months here. I would say that 90% of the people I have asked why they are wintering this year, say it is because the economy is so bad back in the states and they need a job or money. To me this is no reason to spend the winter here. There have been years and years of data collected by the military on Winter-Over Syndrome. This is a mental and physical condition that you go through being stuck in a single place for a long period of time with no sunlight, fresh food, new people etc. This effect is a difficult one, people in the past who have this get very depressed and have a hard time re-acclimating to the real world and social situations.
So I go back to my original observation, people aren't being part of a crew or a community. People here are being very self oriented and loners. This is concerning to me, because I am people person. I enjoy the company of others most the time. What this observation has made me do, is look at my reaction to it. I found that I have become very anti-social, I still eat my meals in the galley with others and have conversation there, but beyond that I spend my free time or non-work, non-eating time in my room reading books, watching movies and playing video games. I normally tend to leave the door open so if someone who is walking by decides they want to sit down and join me they can. But no one has taken advantage of this. Everyone who walks by, keeps walking. So alone I sit in my room. I am enjoying my season, I am spending a lot of time reflecting on things I have done, decisions I have made, accomplishments I have achieved all types of stuff that you would normally think about when you are in solitary confinement in prison. It has allowed me to realize who I am and what I want in life and what I want to do in life. With this I plan, I plan the next step in my life. I prepare the decisions that I make today to effect the new path I want to travel tomorrow or whenever I get out of here........
With the darkness creeping up on us, now less than 2 weeks away. I have began to notice a change in myself as well as others. The sun is virtually gone now, we get a twilight glow for a few hours a day, but right now at 11:00am the moon is still out and a shadow hangs over the station. It is definitely an ere feel. Our winter crew has not jelled together yet like everyone said we would. Before winter started the main reason I was excited to winter was because of all the great people that were staying, the people I had a lot of fun with during the summer months. Well once that last plane left and winter was upon us, all those great people that I was excited to be wintering with locked themselves away from the community. Everyone seems to go to work, get there food to go and eat, drink and hang out in there rooms by themselves or with a select small group. I am disappointed once again. I asked winter-overs from past years if this was normal and at the beginning of the season they said "yes, people hang out alone for awhile but then once the crew jells they will come out and it will be great". Well it has now been almost 2 months since the last plane left and people are the same, so I ask the question again. Is this behavior typical for winter here? Now my answers I receive are "no, this is a really strange winter and the crew just wont jell". 
You know last winter at Palmer I had a similar problem. The majority of our winter crew went to Fire School and OSAR Training back in the states before we went to the Ice. During those two weeks we had a lot of fun, getting to know each other and hanging out. So I was excited to get to Palmer and spend the winter with these great people. Once we arrived on station and relationships were formed. We never saw each other outside of work and meals. I asked the same question last year to my buddy Craig who had seen different summer and winter crews at Palmer. Craig, is this season normal or what? His answer was the same as what I am getting this year at McMurdo, at first its normal but the crew should come together and it never did. So now I start to think, what is so different about these two seasons compared to past ones. 
The obvious one is I am here. Hmmmmm, could I be causing the destructive vibe of the crews??? Although that could be, I think it goes back to a hiring issue. Both seasons the exact populations and the crews were not finalized until very late in the summer season. So what does that get you? That gets people who are new to the program or new to winters, this year roughly 60% and last year every single person except the station manager had never been to Palmer, let alone wintered there. This poor planning on hiring also gets people to winter that were here for summer and did not intend on wintering. I think this is a big issue, because you get your self mentally prepared to spend 4 or 5 months here and then go travel the South Pacific and go home. When all of a sudden without a break you are now spending 12-14 months here. I would say that 90% of the people I have asked why they are wintering this year, say it is because the economy is so bad back in the states and they need a job or money. To me this is no reason to spend the winter here. There have been years and years of data collected by the military on Winter-Over Syndrome. This is a mental and physical condition that you go through being stuck in a single place for a long period of time with no sunlight, fresh food, new people etc. This effect is a difficult one, people in the past who have this get very depressed and have a hard time re-acclimating to the real world and social situations. 
So I go back to my original observation, people aren't being part of a crew or a community. People here are being very self oriented and loners. This is concerning to me, because I am people person. I enjoy the company of others most the time. What this observation has made me do, is look at my reaction to it. I found that I have become very anti-social, I still eat my meals in the galley with others and have conversation there, but beyond that I spend my free time or non-work, non-eating time in my room reading books, watching movies and playing video games. I normally tend to leave the door open so if someone who is walking by decides they want to sit down and join me they can. But no one has taken advantage of this. Everyone who walks by, keeps walking. So alone I sit in my room. I am enjoying my season, I am spending a lot of time reflecting on things I have done, decisions I have made, accomplishments I have achieved all types of stuff that you would normally think about when you are in solitary confinement in prison. It has allowed me to realize who I am and what I want in life and what I want to do in life. With this I plan, I plan the next step in my life. I prepare the decisions that I make today to effect the new path I want to travel tomorrow or whenever I get out of here........
Hey dude, I'm sorry you're not having the good time you thought you were going to have....Keep up the good spirits though. I'll always remember your good attitude and how much fun we had. I'm loving the pictures by the way. Get some long exposure pics of the night time. That'd be sweet. Cheers!
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